October 5, 2013

  • Iowa City October

    It's the opposite of what I was doing last year in a way that makes me question a lot of things about myself and where I'm headed. I really do think you can make your life better and keep moving upwards but after years of dancing sideways like a crab I wasn't sure about the whole thing myself. I didn't think I was capable of a single power, either, but I merely wanted to have the courage that I talked about. I told my friend to move to LA and I encouraged my therapist to uproot and now she's in Austin. A tripod of people dancing off in different directions.

    My roommate and I got drunk together on thursday night and we talked about Brennan and we talked about masturbation and there is a sports bar next to the railroad tracks that plays cardinals games. I drank a lot and he drank and we went to a show and watched Joe Huermann play and it was good and then he electrocuted himself so that was no good. I forgot that before that my roommie asked me to be in a band and he got me free food at the hamburg I was so happy so hungry so happy. And I laid on the couch and met a new cat and a kid named andy who has met me several times before? And we saw a punk band and the lead cut up his shirt and bled and smashed joe milik's favorite mug and joe is out of town so everybody got furious and came outside and talked about how they were gonna confront him and cooper wanted to fight him so I told cooper it was time to go. Then we went to Kyles and I looked at his books and met a guy who was naked under a thin sheet and kyle gave us a ride back which was sweet.
    I'm horribly smitten with brennan worst than it has been with any other human being I don't really know what to do about it. Last night he texted me and I met him at gaslight and we played a game where you are given a phrase and then you put down a card that fills in the blank and then you rank whose is best. And the last card I got said "what will get you laid" and he put down "my soul" and it was the sweetest little doggy thing I don't even know what to think. then we went back to his room and it is full of cats and rocks and he is the sweetest person I've ever met so we kissed and had bloody sex at his insistence and then I woke up with him and I saw Adam and Kyle in the morning and Coop again I am living in a city that is flooded in love with the best people on the planet and I am the luckiest girl.